|Creating a towering inferno effect....|
Bishop Kieron Conry of Arundel and Brighton, has stated that he had difficulty in thinking of sins to confess as a small boy.
He lied, therefore, making up sins so that he would have something to reel off in the confessional.
I am sure he is not the only boy to have done this.
The trouble is, that the Bishop was really laying the blame for such lies, on the repressive clericalism that existed before 1969 (cough).
I never had any such problem at that age; seven year old boys, in my experience, generally have access to a wide range of sinful acts ranging from theft of a tadpole to placing a drawing pin in an older sister's slipper.
And many more in between.
But, just in case there are any young future Bishops out there, here is a prompt list of some of the deadly sins that a typical seven year old Catholic boy might commit:-
1. Switching the church hall instant coffee for gravy granules
2. Emptying the contents of a firework into the thurible, for discovery at a later date
3. Standing on the edge of the cassock of a kneeling altar server (when on acolyte duties) - this does produce rather spectacular results as the kneeling server performs a backwards somersault upon getting to his feet
4. Flicking pellets at the church cat
5. Placing small dead animals in Sister Rosario's desk drawer
6. Removing the clappers from the sanctuary bells
7. Serving at Mass with your pet white mouse in your pocket
8. Placing itching powder on the collar of the MC's cassock
9. Creating a towering inferno effect when entrusted with the thurible
10. Treading on the toes of senior clergymen whilst serving, specifically, Monsignor Derek Worlock
There, Bishop Conry, that doesn't look too hard does it?
Picture: Angelus Online