Mills and Boon goes Latin

"Samantha had been looking forward to Sunday all week.

As the parish choreographer she had led her small group of 'maidens' in creating a special dance in honour of the patron saint of the parish, St Knobbly, and they had been practising their twerk routine for what seemed like ages.

Arriving at the church Samantha felt her heart miss a beat.

Something was wrong, very wrong.
Someone had reversed the altar so that Fr Reg would have his back to the people. Samantha let out a gasp; there was smoke coming from the sacristy, could the church be about to be engulfed in flames?

And then, he appeared and Samantha instinctively knew that she would be safe in this man's hands.

He moved from the hips up and Sam felt a sudden surge of blood to her face as she blushed uncontrollably.

Who was this tall stranger with grey flecked eyes and lean jawed features?

 And why was he wearing a cassock and cotta?

"Hi" he said casually. "Are you looking for somebody?"

"I think I have found him" said Samantha, looking at him from lowered eyes and feeling very pleased that she had put on that new foundation make-up delivered by Pickfords, the day before.

"I'm the thurifer" continued the broad shouldered server, "sorry if the smoke alarmed you".

"Not at all" cooed Samantha. "I like a man who smokes but I thought that Lucifer was supposed to be bad?"

He threw back his head and laughed showing a set of even, white teeth.

"That's very good" he said. "But excuse me while I arrange the sanctuary for the Missa Cantata"

"Th-th-the Missa whatta?" stuttered Samantha, her mind racing as she thought that she knew all of the latino dances but this one did not ring a bell (or, did it?).

"We are having a Solemn High Mass" this morning, said the server. "With three priests, Fr Blogfinegan, Fr Sexton and Fr Harry from 'oop north'".

Samantha felt as if a cold hand was clutching at her heart. "B-but where are you from" she managed to gasp out.

"Me?" said the server, "I'm LMS".

"What?" "Does that mean Lean, Manly and Strong?" asked Samantha hopefully.

"No, you little fool. It stands for Latin Mass Society.
Today is the day that the Latin Mass returns to St Knobbly's, on his great feast".

"You brute!" exclaimed Samantha as she ripped the thin, flimsy lace from his broad, manly chest.
"Does this mean no dancing on the sanctuary and no more Special Holy Aunties of the Eucharist?"

'Fraid so" said the server, your twerking days are over, there's a whole world out there just waiting to be rediscovered. Why don't we step into the future together, who knows, you might even come to love Latin".

"That's true" thought Samantha as she snuggled into the coarse black cloth of his cassock.

"Maybe the Latin Mass does have something to offer that is bigger than both of us".

With apologies to Mills and Boon.




 

Are Latin Masses increasing in number under Pope Francis?

The question is purely rhetorical; I have no evidence to suggest that EF Masses have either increased or decreased under Pope Francis but, I have suspicions.

"Brick by brick" Does that mean more or less?

Those suspicions are based on feedback (so they are strictly anecdotal in evidence terms) from liberal Catholics who gush and spout about how humble the new Holy Father is and how he just hates all that ritual and grandeur (by which they mean the orthodox liturgy) and how he has cut through all that liturgical lace (by which they mean that he has reverted back to the dreary old Novus Ordo format of poncho vestments with modern motifs).

I do not know many liberal priests but, my guess is that they are saying much the same sort of things; most of the bishops will also be singing off the same hymn sheet, no doubt.

There is a sort of air of despondency in some circles and only an occasional straw from Rome for traditionally minded Catholics to clutch at.

But, how goes the fight in England and Wales?

Are Latin Masses still plodding forward, brick by brick in Fr Z fashion or, are they retreating into pre 2007 oblivion?

I do not know if the Latin Mass Society has done the sums on this one as yet but my feeling is that orthodox priests are, once more, on the back foot and that any growth in EF Mass numbers has died the death and may, even be decreasing.

Yet the shouts from the seminaries seem to state the opposite - so what's to worry about, this could be a temporary glitch that will right itself in 5 or 6 years time.

Possibly.

But we all know what happens next, do we not?

A young priest, about to assume control in his first parish, meets with his Bishop for the first time since he was ordained a few weeks previously.

And the Bishop gives him the chat; nothing too direct, just a few menacing words based upon the following:

1. "I would remind you of your obedience to me (forget about Rome Sonny, this is where it all happens")

2. "Remember, you have a good parish in St Apathetic's, please do nothing to upset this calm and offend the parishioners (if you do I can promise you a public humiliation in front of your flock")

3. "Now you are a employee of the Diocese, of course all of your pension rights and retirement plans will be looked after by me and my successors (step out of line by getting all latiney and I'll chop off your superannuation tout suite")

4. "Remember, I want none of this EF Mass nonsense (celebrate just one Mass and I'll have you transferred to the Convent of the Sisters of the Blue Cardigan where you will be on call as chaplain to five major hospitals, 23 nursing homes, the League of Charismatic Nutters and a committee member of the ecumenical group forging links with the local Freemasonry Lodge")

5. Now kneel my son while I give you my blessing (and if you so much as make a move towards kissing my ring you're toast!")

A 'new' Latin Mass for London?

My youngest daughter has just informed me of a 'new' Latin Mass centre in London - Whey-hey! and all that!

I thought that I knew all the crevices wherein a Sunday EF Mass was to be found in the London area.

 The Oratory at 9am, of course, St James's (I like the apostrophe) Spanish Place at 9.30am and St Bede's Clapham Park at the very social hour of 10.45am.

Then there's St Mary Magdalen at Wandsworth Common at the even more social hour of 11am and that's it for parishes with a TLM every Sunday (I'm leaving Blackfen out of it as they are, I think, a bit beyond the London boundaries, sorry Fr T).

Not a lot for Britain's capital city and mother Diocese of England and Wales but......there you go, come the revolution etc.

But now, thanks to Miss Collins, I am informed that St Margaret's Convent Chapel, Canning Town, has a Latin Mass at 6pm every Sunday! How come this one passed me by?

Easy. It's not in Southwark or Westminster, it's in Brentwood Diocese.

Aaah....Brentwood Diocese. Last time I mentioned the scarcity of Sunday EF Masses in Brentwood I got a good roasting from many good bloggers who knew otherwise but, on checking the Latin Mass Society quill and parchment Mass Listings online, I see that only St Margaret's offers the Mass of all time on every Sunday - in the whole Diocese!

Now, if you have the knowledge as the London Cabbies say, please don't beat me up, if you know of other Latin Mass parishes where a Sunday EF Mass is offered, write to the LMS and ask 'em to feature in it in their ledger.

But, in all of this is there a smidgeon of misinformation?

Can you say, with any accuracy which town is in which Diocese? Is Baldock in Westminster or Brentwood? Guildford in Southwark or Arundel and Brighton? Ware in Northampton or Westminster?

And don't even start on Southwark North and Southwark (Kent) ugh!

If you were a visitor from overseas (are we still allowed to say 'foreigner'?) not knowing the geography of England and Wales, where would you begin with a Diocesan index?

I would suggest that the LMS might consider two things in all of this; one, that they produce an index of Mass centres by town or city in alphabetical order, and, two, that they expand their listings to include all Latin Masses, not just ones where they have a finger in the liturgical pie.
Not just those that they support and organise.

And one final point regarding St Margaret's...it was the parish wherein my dear parents were born and brought up.
My mother was the organist when just a slip of a girl and my father painted extensive murals for the church, I don't suppose for one minute that they are still there.
All colour was whitewashed out after the Second Reformation. I think I'm still allowed to say that.

Pilgrimage qualifies for Guinness Book of Records

Yesterday's Latin Mass Society's Annual Pilgrimage was a real record breaker - except that...it was a record in the wrong direction.

                                      Cardigan, less  than 100 miles from the capital of Wales

Only 17 souls attended (18 if you include the church cat) and, if anyone so inclined had fired a shotgun during Mass, I am sure that none of the congregation would have been injured.

If you project this decline in numbers (roughly 50% down on last year), by my reckoning, in the year 2017, only the church cat will be in attendance and there's some speculation that he may be Church of Wales!

It was, a great occasion, nonetheless; the Newcastle Emlyn Schola sang the Mass beautifully and the servers served well.

After Mass came a break for tea and cake and then devotions in front of the Blessed Sacrament led by Paul, deacon of Menevia, and many thanks to him.

However, 17 people at a national pilgrimage is something of an insult to Our Lady of the Taper. Despite the valiant efforts of our LMS representative, it just did not cut the mustard.

What to do?

I do not know how much publicity and promotional activity LMS HQ put behind the day, it would be interesting to be able to see a breakdown of pilgrimage support costs broken down by pilgrimage.

Will there be another pilgrimage next year? I hope so. There is no shortage of would be helpers on standby.

I have two constructive suggestions to make.

First, be aware of Catholic etiquette and good manners when planning such an important event.

And, second, start the planning process for 2013 now, yes, now!

Stop the world, I want to get off

A perfectly sound and good petition aimed at respectfully requesting the Holy Father to say Mass in the Extraordinary Form soon (but it would be sensible if possibly it could take place at a traditional pilgrimage due to be held in November)...has ruffled a few feathers.

Not among the charismatic camp, or the camp camp but among the traditional camp.

It appears that an organisation formed expressly, in 1964, to protect liturgical abuse in the Church (hats off! what a great job they have done!) feels that they are being associated with this petition.

Ahem. Just run that past me once more.

A traditional organisation is upset because they think they might be associated with a good initiative to restore the Latin Mass.....right, time for a quiet moment I think.

Well no one, as far as I am aware, has mentioned this nameless organisation. So what is going on?

I checked the background to the group and find that they are a  sort of federation of organisations that includes the various Latin Mass Societies around the world.

Oh well, that it explains it then.

And please, please, give the petition a shove on your blog. It is a perfectly reasonable exercise and it is not connected in any way to U no who!


Here is the link:

Just click on this word: PETITION

A step closer to Holywell

And, on our way there, tomorrow,  in our medieval minibus, we shall sing hymns and say the Rosary and indulge in some good Catholic humour (in the manner of medieval pilgrims).
This is a beautiful piece although, I suspect, we shall be more in the 'Faith of Our Fathers' neck of the woods.

I found this hymn to St Winefride in an old Westminster Hymnal....no idea as to the music, but it tells her story rather well:


                                                            ST WINEFRIDE

More fair than all the vernal flowers

Embosom'd in the dales,

St Winefride in beauty bloom'd,

The rose of ancient Wales.

With every loveliest grace adorn'd,

The Lamb's unsullied bride,

Apart from all the world she dwelt

Upon this mountainside.

Caradoc then, with impious love,

Her fleeing steps pursued,

And in her sacred maiden blood

His cruel hands imbrued.

He straight the debt of vengeance paid,

Ingulf'd in yawning flame;

But God a deed of wonder work'd

To her immortal fame.

For where the grassy sward received

The martyr's sever'd head,

This holy fountain upward gush'd,

Of crystal vein'd with red.

Here miracles of might are wrought;

Here all diseases fly;

Here see the blind, and speak the dumb,

Who but in faith draw nigh.

Assist us, glorious Winefride,

Dear virgin, ever blest!

The passions of our hearts appease,

And lull each storm to rest.

Sacred and ancient - the Lourdes of Wales

Yup, the Confraternity of the Holy Cross (some 10 or 12 of us)  is off, on Sunday, to Holywell to join the LMS annual Pilgrimage.

This holy place is also called the Lourdes of Wales and I hope to be able to dip my toe in the water (no time for a full Lourdes type plunge, I'm afraid - Deo gratias).

I shall pray for you all here, especially Guild of Blessed Titus Brandsma members and Charlie J.

"When England returns to Walsingham Our Lady will return to England" ~ Pope Leo XIII

This from the Latin Mass Society.......

You are invited to the third Latin Mass Society walking pilgrimage for the conversion of England. We will be walking from Ely to Walsingham from 24 to 26 August 2012. This is a bank-holiday weekend. Pilgrims will meet by 7pm on the evening of Thursday 23 August at the Guide Hall, St. Johns Road, Ely, CB6 3BW. The pilgrimage will begin with the Traditional Mass in St Ethelreda's Catholic Church 19 Egremont Street, Ely, CB6 1AE on Friday morning (Mass at 6.15am).

There will be a sung Traditional Latin Mass each day and Confession will be available throughout the pilgrimage.

Mass on the second day will be in the private chapel at Oxburgh Hall. This is a c15th moated manor house which is still the home of the Bedingfield family who built it nearly six hundred years ago. Oxburgh Hall was a recusant house in penal times and has a priest hole.

During the pilgrimage there will be recitation of the Rosary, the singing of traditional hymns, periods of silence and quiet reflection, and the chance to chat with other pilgrims and to renew friendships, or extablish new ones.

See our promotional video: http://en.gloria.tv/?media=275498 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibaxStQFP5U

Accommodation en route

This pilgrimage is open to all ages and to families.

We want to encourage as many families to attend this pilgrimage as possible. For that reason we have secured indoor accommodation for each night. The indoor accommodation is for use by women and children. Women and children are also free to camp if they wish. Camping is compulsory for men, although this will be indoors on the Thursday night. Please note that children under 18 years of age must be accompanied by an adult.

Daily Mass open to everyone - not just pilgrims

If, for any reason, you are unable to take part in the pilgrimage itself, you are more than welcome to attend any or all of the Masses along the way. The details are as follows:

Friday, 24 August: St Etheldreda’s Catholic Church, 19 Egremont Street, Ely, CB6 1AE 6.15am

Saturday, 25 August: Oxburgh Hall, Oxborough, near Swaffham, Norfolk PE33 9PS 8am

Sunday, 26 August: Chapel of Reconciliation, Catholic National Shrine, Walsingham, 2pm  

The Final Day of the Pilgrimage

The pilgrimage will conclude on Sunday afternoon starting at 2pm at the National Shrine in Walsingham (in the Chapel of Reconciliation next to the Slipper Chapel). Pilgrims will have the chance to visit the Slipper Chapel as well. This will be followed by a procession along the Holy Mile from the Slipper Chapel to the ruins of the Abbey in the centre of Walsingham itself. The Abbey grounds have been booked from 4pm and there will be prayers of thanksgiving offered there. The gate to the grounds closes at 5pm, so pilgrims will have the chance to spend some time there, after the conclusion of the pilgrimage.

The Slipper Chapel is so called because pilgrims would traditionally leave their shoes there before walking the Holy Mile to the Holy House of Walsingham, where in the eleventh century Our Lady appeared in a dream to the Lady Richeldis de Faverches and asked her to build a house like the Holy House of Nazareth. The house contained a wooden statue of the Virgin Mary with the child Jesus seated on her lap. A priory was later built beside the Holy House. During the reign of King Henry VIII the priory was closed as part of the Dissolution of the Monasteries and the statue was taken to London and burnt.

Coach from London on the Sunday

For those wishing just to attend the final Mass in Walsingham, there is a coach leaving London on Sunday, 26 August for the final Mass at Walsingham. If you wish to book a place, please phone the LMS office (020 7404 7284).

Can You Lend a Hand? Volunteers Needed!

As the pilgrimage grows from year to year, we need more volunteers to help things run smoothly. We especially need people to help drive support vehicles. All your expenses (petrol etc) will be covered and you will be offered a reduced rate to attend the pilgrimage. We also need people willing to help with stewarding and others to help with the preparation of food. Phone the LMS office on 020 7404 7284 or email us on info@lms.org.uk if you can help. Thank you.

Getting to and from the pilgrimage

The Guide Hall in Ely is a short walk from Ely train station. At the conclusion of the pilgrimage we can take you back to Ely. Please note that the pilgrimage will end at c.5pm on Sunday and it takes approximately an hour and a half to get from Walsingham to Ely.

Should you have any queries about driving to the pilgrimage please contact the LMS office on 020 7404 7284 or email us on info@lms.org.uk

What would Our Lady wear to Mass?

There has been some debate recently (again) regarding the wearing of the mantilla. Mary O'Regan of
 The Path Less Taken has a sound and well reasoned post on the subject as does Dorothy B of
An Honour and a Responsibility, Annie of the Arundel & Brighton blog and Joe Shaw of LMS Chairman. - so I feel quite safe at throwing my two penn'orth into the ring.

I think that all of the bloggers who have commented so far have been at pains to point out that there is no obsessive disorder involved here; if women wish to go to Mass bare headed, sobeit. That is their decision.

So, I would like to take you back in time, not so very long ago, maybe seventy or eighty years or so.
To the age when both men and women wore hats as part of their everyday headwear.
No male over the age of ten would have walked the streets without a cap of some kind on their head and every female from pram stage onwards would have done likewise.

Off to Mass? Where's your hat Albert?

So what happened when the Catholics among them entered a church?

Well, of course, the men would remove their hats and the women would keep them on; it was the custom, the culture, if you like.

And today, the custom has not changed for men; we still remove our knotted handkerchiefs, bowlers or derbys when we enter where God Himself is present.

Would it cause dissent if I strolled in wearing a rather natty (if frayed) Panama? I rather think so.

A small pilgrimage but with a lot of spirit!

Yesterday, Sunday 7th August saw the Annual LMS Pilgrimage to the National Shrine of Wales, Our Lady of the Taper in Cardigan.



Commencing with the Angelus at 12 noon there followed an hour's meditation in front of the statue of Our Lady before lunch in the Church hall.

Confessions followed at 2.30pm and then a Sung Mass with the ever wise Mgr Johnson as celebrant, Steffano Mazzeo as MC and Seamus, Corey and Jeff Pillar as altar servers.

The Newcastle Emlyn Schola sang like angels and all left the church on a spiritual high.

After a brief break for refreshments the pilgrims returned to the church for Benediction celebrated by Deacon Jim Caddick and some rousing hymns to Our Lady.

Benediction with Deacon Jim Caddick

Now, as far as numbers are concerned only 35 souls attended but in the case of a pilgrimage, numbers should not matter too much; it is the spiritual strength and renewal that is all important (although, it would be very good to see this very important occasion at least level pegging with the Holywell Pilgrimage held each July).

Very good to meet up again with the LMS General Manager, Michael Lord who travelled down specially for the day and thanks must also go to the LMS representative for Menevia, Luigi Dimaio. 

The LMS Annual Pilgrimage to the National Shrine of Our Lady

            SUNDAY 7th AUGUST 2011

The National Shrine of Our Lady of the Taper

           North Road, Cardigan, SA43 1LT

PROGRAMME:

                     12 noon: The Angelus followed by one hour with Our

                                    Lady of the Taper, Rosary & Traditional Hymns

                     1pm:        Lunch (please bring your own)

                      2.30pm:  Confessions

                      3pm:       Sung Votive Mass of Our Lady

                      4pm:       Tea and refreshments followed by

                                     BENEDICTION

Please do all you can to support this important national pilgrimage and pay homage to Our Lady

Our Lady of the Taper, pray for Wales

Our Lady of the Taper, pray for us!

Ramblings.....(or rantings)

Served at Mass on Corpus Christi but, after Mass the celebrant left the procession to meet with the congregation as they left the church. We servers, complete with 3 non participating priests, proceeded to the Sacristy where we knelt for a blessing. The lead priest looked aghast and I had to explain that we wanted his blessing - he gave it, in English and with a look of shock and concern on his face.
At OF Masses are blessings not extended to the altar servers after Mass?

In correspondence with an Indian seminarian and fellow blogger. I posed the question as to how he regarded the fact that we in Great Britain are now recruiting young Indian priests to plug the lack of vocations gap. He stated that, as we (GB) had helped India over the years with missionaries, legal systems, railway networks etc, he was pleased that his country could reciprocate by sending us missionary priests to support us in our hour of need. Great sentiments but I still believe it to be a poor practice on behalf of the CBEW.

If tobacco commercials are banned on British television - why has the go ahead been given to screen commercials for abortion clinics?

If a 'Red Mass' may be held for Lawyers and a White Mass for Physicians shouldn't the Warwick Street Masses be Pink ones?

Has anyone seen Melanie Lately.....lately? This is The Tablet stringer who wrote on how striking one's chest at the Confiteor equates to child abuse. Can't find her on Google, even Ozzy Google.

Can we just agree that Shakespeare was obviously a Catholic - and move on?

Is Archbishop Nichol's style of management autocratic? (Vaughan School and Catholic Prison Chaplains episodes spring to mind).

Can we just close down the Catholic Church  in Austria and start again with a clean slate?

Just who is going to queue to confess their sins to the Holy Father in Madrid? Must be very brave or completely barking.

When will the LMS tackle Menevia Diocese regarding their website information on availability of EF Masses? - it is wrong on 4 counts (which is a lot when you only have 6 venues to list)

Why are Syro Malabar rite Masses springing up everywhere yet we still struggle to find a Church with a Sunday EF Mass?

Oh, and when will nuns learn that dressing a la British Home Stores marks them out more than a wimple and habit?

Pilgrimage to the national shrine of Wales, Our Lady of the Taper

Our Lady of the Taper needs YOU!

The LMS has announced Sunday 7th August as the date for the pilgrimage to Our Lady of the Taper, full details will follow but there will be an EF Mass and Benediction plus a refreshment break - could this be an opportunity for a Welsh blognic?????

Our Lady of the Taper is in Cardigan and we struggle to maintain our numbers in this far flung spot so please visit on 7th August. It is very beautiful, has many good and inexpensive links and golf clubs; just the place for a long weekend away.

Just a few miles down the coast is Newport, home
to good accommodation (Newport Links Golf Club)
and excellent eating places......renew the body as well as the soul!

Bring your family, your friends, your parish, solvent enemies (if you have any), in brief, just come and enjoy a momentous occasion.

ARCHBISHOP STACK - DO YOU BELIEVE IN OUR LADY'S INTERCESSIONARY POWERS?

"Not an English and Welsh Bishop again"

                                                     

The new Archbishop Designate of Cardiff, His Grace, George Stack gave an address to the General Synod of the Church of England in which he, apparently, denied the role of Mary, Mother of God with regards to her intercession.

Now the important word is "apparently" because, as William Oddie of The Catholic Herald points out, the Archbishop's phraseology is open to some interpretation - but it damn well shouldn't be! Surely that's why our priests rise up the hierarchical ranks, because of their ability (among many other things) to pronounce clearly and without error on the teachings of Holy Mother Church.

It is not good enough to make a statement that leaves a number of speculative options open as to the meaning behind the words.

I am not one of ++ Stack's biggest fans, I disliked the way he handled the Vaughan School debacle and how he responded to letters with a letter of his own (standard response) plus a computerised signature......very low grade in my books.

However, I would like to think that, on this occasion, the Archbishop has been misunderstood and I would also hope that he will issue a corrective statement in which he clearly lays out the role of Our Lady as part of Church teaching.

BUT..........more than that I would hope (and strongly recommend to his Grace) that he leads a pilgrimage to the National Shrine of Wales, Our Lady of the Taper, in Cardigan.

Our Lady of the Taper - what is the
relevance of Lourdes if we do not
believe in Our Lady's intercession?

 In fact, it would be a very good thing for Welsh Catholics if the new Archbishop were to lead the Latin Mass Society Pilgrimage to the shrine this year - and even celebrate a Latin Mass (EF, that is).

You see......it's not just the people of Cardiff who want to know, it's not even the Catholics of the rest of Wales, it's all Catholics from all over the world who want to be reassured of the Archbishop Designate's belief in Our Holy Mother.