Tuesday, 3 July 2012

In search of a queer title

Aha! In the aftermath of the proposed  recognition for Homosexual "Marriages" we are moving, predictably, on to the next stage.....wait for it....when we have a homosexual Knight such as Sir Elton John, what title should be given to his "partner" David Furnish?

Of course! How could we overlook David who, for eons, has been known as EJ's squeeze (ugh!)

Just what can he possibly be dubbed?

He's too advanced in years to have a handle such as The Honourable Catamite.

I suppose, being logical, we should, when considering affairs of gender blending, look at a title that pays equal homage to the two heterosexual titles that apply; to both a Peer and a Knight, "Lord" "Sir" and "Lady".

The best that I can up with is "Lardy" which, I think you will agree is a very satisfactory outcome, not to say, appropriate, even.

So, from now on it's a round of applause, if you will, for Sir Elton and Lardy John - perfect!


  1. Lemme see: etymologically, it's all to do with getting your bread, literaly, mostly, along with etc, in a bigger fish's household, way back when. I understand the accepted root for lady is the loafkneader, lord the loaf cutter hence sharerouter.
    What role would each of these alpha male(?) couples be reflected as regards acting on dough and bread for their dependants?
    I not entirely sure I want to know.

  2. minor correction:
    hlaf -weard: loaf WARDER, not cutter.->lord
    hlaf ‘loaf of bread’ + dige ‘female kneader.->Lady. female, with it.
    So hlaf + ? -> ?
    what in Anglosaxon could turn into "--ardy.", and did they and do they?

  3. Richard, Dr Caring Bung MP anticipated, and answered this little conundrum, just a year ago. http://bishopsmirk.blogspot.com/2011/07/dr-bung-mp-man-for-our-times.html

  4. Good to see you're not a bigot or homophobe in any way, Mr. Collins...

  5. Thanks Mike, always glad of your support with your grasp of the English language.